The Magic of Turfucken

SARAH: When I laugh, it hurts my back.
SARAH: My back is all sorts of fucken broken.
SARAH: Turfucken.
SARAH: That’s never not going to be funny.

Editor's Note: Turfucken.

We made up a new word. A disgruntled e-mail arrived and included the phrase "fucken politics." We decided that "fucken" was a combination of "fuck" and "chicken." We then decided that it was like a turducken, which is a duck inside a chicken inside a turkey. And then we invented "turfucken." And then we realized we needed to be able to use "turfucken" in a sentence, so here it is:

"Oh, I would, but I'm not up turfucken tonight."