Dearest, Most Lovely Starshine,
I hope you are sitting down, because I have the best news ever. As you may know, I'm going to a barbecue in a few weeks with New Manfriend.
And you remember Ugly Baby. Of course you do. That thing probably haunts your dreams.
WELL. The mother of Ugly Baby is friends with the guy who's holding the barbecue. Meaning that maybe, possibly...Ugly Baby may be at this party. And at the risk of breaking all the cameras in the universe, I am going to try to have my picture taken with said Ugly Baby, just so that I can say I did it.
It might be like staring into the sun, but sometimes you need to do things like this.
Love,
Sarah
Showing posts with label starshine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label starshine. Show all posts
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
The Lexicon Continues to Expand
SARAH: Do you know what a road soder is?
STARSHINE: I do not.
SARAH: A road soder (soda) is a beer.
SARAH: It's a joke in my family.
STARSHINE: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
SARAH: Going on a long drive? TAKE A ROAD SODER!
SARAH: FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO DRIVE.
STARSHINE: Road soders are good when you're on the train!
SARAH: Oh, Starshine.
SARAH: Those are train soders.
STARSHINE: I do not.
SARAH: A road soder (soda) is a beer.
SARAH: It's a joke in my family.
STARSHINE: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
SARAH: Going on a long drive? TAKE A ROAD SODER!
SARAH: FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO DRIVE.
STARSHINE: Road soders are good when you're on the train!
SARAH: Oh, Starshine.
SARAH: Those are train soders.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
I Believe The Technical Term is Shittrombone
SARAH: Starshine just called someone a shittrumpet.
SARAH: I cannot handle my life
SARAH: I cannot handle my life
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Snake Oil is for Amateurs
KATE: I'm having an awful day.
KATE: And I'm covered in hives.
STARSHINE: Drink some water!
SARAH: Starshine knows what’s up.
SARAH: And that is: drink all the water and then you can cure all your pains.
SARAH: We should sell bottled water as a miracle cure.
SARAH: I bet it would work, too. We could be traveling medicine ladies and we could both tell everyone how water has fixed us.
SARAH: Well, maybe you shouldn’t talk now because you have hives.
SARAH: But I could say that water healed me.
KATE: Genius. It can be the Starshine-Sarah-Kate traveling medicine show.
KATE: With a soundtrack by the Full-Out Criers.
SARAH: We are going to make like, a million dollars.
SARAH: Can we travel around in a wagon with panels that come down when you pull on a rope? I feel that is only appropriate.
KATE: Absolutely. And we need top hats, and sticks, because you can't have a medicine show without gesturing and hitting things with your walking stick.
KATE: What'll we call it?
SARAH: I don’t know. We will figure it out. We need to make a website like, stat.
SARAH: And maybe if we’re REALLY good, we can have an infomercial where I can just say “BUY THIS MIRACLE WATER IT WILL CURE EVERYTHING INCLUDING PREGNANCY I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW THAT WOULD WORK”
SARAH: Hmm…what should we call the magical miracle water?
KATE: Unicorn Juice.
SARAH: YES ABSOLUTELY YES
KATE: Unicorn Juice. Coming soon to a fairground and/or Target parking lot near you.
KATE: And I'm covered in hives.
STARSHINE: Drink some water!
SARAH: Starshine knows what’s up.
SARAH: And that is: drink all the water and then you can cure all your pains.
SARAH: We should sell bottled water as a miracle cure.
SARAH: I bet it would work, too. We could be traveling medicine ladies and we could both tell everyone how water has fixed us.
SARAH: Well, maybe you shouldn’t talk now because you have hives.
SARAH: But I could say that water healed me.
KATE: Genius. It can be the Starshine-Sarah-Kate traveling medicine show.
KATE: With a soundtrack by the Full-Out Criers.
SARAH: We are going to make like, a million dollars.
SARAH: Can we travel around in a wagon with panels that come down when you pull on a rope? I feel that is only appropriate.
KATE: Absolutely. And we need top hats, and sticks, because you can't have a medicine show without gesturing and hitting things with your walking stick.
KATE: What'll we call it?
SARAH: I don’t know. We will figure it out. We need to make a website like, stat.
SARAH: And maybe if we’re REALLY good, we can have an infomercial where I can just say “BUY THIS MIRACLE WATER IT WILL CURE EVERYTHING INCLUDING PREGNANCY I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW THAT WOULD WORK”
SARAH: Hmm…what should we call the magical miracle water?
KATE: Unicorn Juice.
SARAH: YES ABSOLUTELY YES
KATE: Unicorn Juice. Coming soon to a fairground and/or Target parking lot near you.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
The History of Anything, I Say
KATE: Google says: "Vet Scopes Affordable Yes - 8mm 150cm Endoscopes New Veterinary Endoscopy Systems"
KATE: Google thinks maybe you and I are going to be doing some mobile veterinary medicine.
KATE: That's sweet of you to think, Google, but it's going to be more like "mobile margarita medicine."
SARAH: I like the idea of mobile margarita medicine. We have the best ideas. And Stephanie is going to make us dinner!
KATE: Actually, dinner's pretty much made (hello crockpot). So we should have a lovely evening.
SARAH: Whatever. The fact that it’s basically made means there is more time for drinking. And that’s the best idea I’ve ever heard EVER in the history of ANYTHING
KATE: Google thinks maybe you and I are going to be doing some mobile veterinary medicine.
KATE: That's sweet of you to think, Google, but it's going to be more like "mobile margarita medicine."
SARAH: I like the idea of mobile margarita medicine. We have the best ideas. And Stephanie is going to make us dinner!
KATE: Actually, dinner's pretty much made (hello crockpot). So we should have a lovely evening.
SARAH: Whatever. The fact that it’s basically made means there is more time for drinking. And that’s the best idea I’ve ever heard EVER in the history of ANYTHING
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